juliet, when we made this video you used to cry.

at the behest of this don, this post is dedicated to pomelo head cat.

everyone has an opinion about what is the worst music video ever. but i have found the singular champion.

for me, a video being bad in its own right is not bad enough. it must be as bad as the song it reps is good, such that this disparity is a chasm so deep and wide that one must consciously, actively keep one's esteem for said song from falling into this canyon.

apropos of this, while researching baci di romeo for bene, i stumbled upon the video for dire straits's romeo and juliet. after two frames of it, i knew i had made a discovery akin to penicillin.

you see, i think romeo and juliet is an amazing song. catchy but elegant melody, eloquent-yet-edgy lyrics, an overall timeless sound; i mean, any work of art that manages to be a direct homage to both romeo and juliet and west side story without coming off clichéd or hackneyed is pretty classy in my eyes and ears. i consider it to be the definition of a five-itunes-stars track. (i just spent a good chunk of time trying to find a stream of the song to link to, but it was fruitless. but you can hear the song along with the video itself, whose link will follow.)

accepting that this video was made in the 80's, during the infancy of the music video-making industry - at least, i hope that's when it was made - it's still nothing short of atrocious. its level of tackiness, cheesiness, and literal interpretation flies directly in the face of the absence of these qualities in the song. in fact, it craps on said face like a canadian goose that was fed all-bran and raisins for breakfast. i mean, this might be the first thing i've ever known was diced from the appearance of actual dice! it hasn't tainted my affection for the song, but it will surely be hard for me to hear the song without having these horrible images in my mind, for a long time.

without further ado: the worst video ever made by men with cameras.